an unconventional crush

have you ever had a crush on someone that you know you could probably never date? regardless of whether or not they liked you, you just couldn't date them. you'd like to be really good friends with them though because you are unfortunately attracted to them and their magnetic personality. when you're not around them, nothing happens, when you are around them it's like you only really want to talk to them. they fade to the back of your memory until you talk to them again and the spark reignites whatever feelings you had for them before. it's a feeling that you can't explain but distresses you. you could never imagine yourself being intimate with this person but somehow there is attraction there. as much as you try to fight it, you can't really seem to shake the feeling so eventually you give in. after a few times of distress, it starts to bother you. am i really attracted to this person? you want to confirm it by talking to them again, but you can't...because although you are friends you hardly ever see them. this is an unconventional crush. you want others to offer ideas or solutions but all they can say is uhh...due to the utter shock of who it is. i guess the feeling will fade until i see them again...and at that point, whatever will be will be.

"just because i don't say anything
doesn't mean i don't like you.
I open my mouth and I try and i try
But no words came out.

Without 40 ounces of social skills
I'm just an ass in the crack of humanity.
I'm just a huge manatee.
A huge manatee.

And besides you're probably holding hands
With some skinny, pretty girl that likes to
Talk about bands, and
All I wanna do is ride bikes with you
And stay up late and watch cartoons.

I tried to ask you to your face,
But no words came out.
I put on my hood and walked away.
That doesn't mean I don't like you."
-Nothing Came Out (Moldy Peaches)